...random experiences, observations and thoughts of my daily life as mommy...past journeys and dreams of journeys yet to be taken creating my life story as i go...

Monday, November 8, 2010

"mommy when can i have wings?" and admiring leaves

i wanted to record a few "little things" my children have been saying and doing...sea is really obsessed with wings...not just wanting to wear them and pretend she is a fairy but she wants to know when she is going to get REAL wings...i suppose i'm to blame for this since i made up a story about a little girl who just had to believe enough and then one night she got wings...but i figure allowing her to believe this possible is not much more of a stretch than santa or the tooth fairy. i'd really love to imagine her flying around and the idea brings her a lot of joy. today she was really sad because two of her closest friends said really mean and hurtful things to her about never wanting to play with her again (and i believe even about wanting her to die?!) and though i'm sure these comments didn't come from nowhere as sea can have a difficult time sharing and can be mean herself, it still breaks my heart. i still am considering homeschooling her so i can at least be there to monitor some of this and help them talk it through and refocus. i suggested tomorrow sea approach the one little girl and say "(her name), you are really special to me. i'm sorry we were fighting yesterday and i want to work it out" or something like that. she explained to me that part of the problem was that this friend doesn't want her to have other friends. that is a tough one. hard to understand at age 5 how to be loyal and still have other friends. so i suggested she could do more one-on-one playdates with this girl so they feel like they still have a special bond even if sea is friendly with many people. i'll be interested to see the teacher's take on all this in parent-teacher conferences next week. i know i can be extra sensitive and over-involved so i'll try to go into the conference keeping that in mind. manuel is much more rational and reasonable than me but i believe he is quite protective of sea, too so we will both be strong advocates for her (if you haven't read my post about my experience in third grade i was just thinking how timely this experience is for sea right now). ok, enough on that...i just felt a little extra sad tonight seeing her so sad and hearing how she doesn't want to go back to school and doesn't want to have playdates with these girls and can she have playdates with other kids (she listed mainly boys though i suppose with the ratio of 6 girls in a class of 24 that is inevitable!) ...

on a lighter note, today while we were driving i pointed out a scarecrow to story and he said "no, HAPPY crow!" which i thought was cute. with a little extra energy i might have found a photo of him by a scarecrow but instead will share this photo of him dropping leaves ever so tenderly on his cousin meadow's head...she turned one oct 28th...if i can pull it together i'll do a post on that along with some photos...
and i will end this with the idea of little things...stopping to appreciate them, that is...in our mommy-and-me waldorf class the teacher passes out articles to read and discuss and the last one was about a famous violinist who always has sold out concerts costing over $100/seat who did an impromptu "concert" in a new york subway (undercover) though with the same violin and same music...he played for close to an hour and made about $32 in change and had a remarkably small handful of people who took the time to stop and appreciate his music. the lesson to be learned (i'm sure there are many) but that the article was focusing on is that so many people don't take a few extra minutes in life to stop and appreciate beauty in unexpected places...so i'm going to try and SLOW down...allow more time for stops...pick up more leaves...


  1. I'm so sorry about what Sea is experiencing right now with the little girls in her class -- I can only imagine how confused and hurt she is right now, and how heartbroken you are as her mother. Your thoughts on how to approach this seem very reasonable and helpful, especially in giving Sea suggestions on how to approach the other girl, and in trying to have some one-on-one play dates to strengthen their connection with one another. I hope it all resolves well!

    I love that she is wondering when she'll get her own fairy wings! There's something so magical and precious in a child's imagination. It's sad that we, as adults, tend to loose that gift. It's wonderful that you're encouraging her creativity!

    How you ended this post really resonated with me. I've been trying so hard to slow down and focus on the here and now, but it's not always easy. This was a wonderful example to share, and just the reminder that I needed today.

    Thank you for stopping by my blog!

  2. Beautiful about the wings. I have them in my inner child's world. I remember in 5th grade having a friend who only wanted me to be friends with her. It didn't work out of course. I guess my friend must have felt very insecure.
    I have a thing about not being 'owned' by a job or anybody.


leave me comments here