...random experiences, observations and thoughts of my daily life as mommy...past journeys and dreams of journeys yet to be taken creating my life story as i go...

Thursday, April 28, 2011

misunderstanding sea and the spider

this picture doesn't have the spider, the spider web, or me with my daughter sea. but it does show her innocence and lovely sweet smile and really i just wanted to get this story down while i have a couple minutes free this morning and everyone is asleep.

i always felt misunderstood as a child. many times as an adult. i felt i was a good person with good intentions that were missed by many. i believe sea marches to her own drummer and may have this experience in life, too. hopefully she has also been blessed with more self-confidence and unconditional acceptance than i had...

so here is the story...about a week ago i saw sea hurling a rock through a large spider web right outside out front door. i immediately felt angry and even made knee jerk assumptions about sea's character (fortunately these remained in my head and i didn't say she was a "mean" girl)...i did say "why would you do that?! why would you hurt a spider? don't you remember charlotte? she spent so long spinning her web..."

there was really no response from sea...i believe she even shrugged like "oh, well" and with that response i made even worse judgments about her character and assumptions of apathy, lack of feeling, etc...

yesterday as we were walking under this web she remarked "oh good, there are a few holes in the web" and so i said "why?" to which she replied "so some of the bugs can escape"

i feel like crying as i write this. such a small story. such a small example. and even such a small bug. but so symbolic! this is the sort of thing i got misunderstood about because most people don't take the time to make holes in webs so some of the bugs can live!

i adore my sweet daughter and hope to work harder at assuming her intentions are good and her sweet soul, with its human flaws is doing the best she can...

1 comment:

  1. This was beautiful...thank you for sharing that moment with "us." T


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